Yesterday I wrote about my behaviors as an Energy Vampire. Today I want to examine ways to stop this behavior in me.
When and as I saw myself behaving like an energy sucker, I began to ask myself: why am I doing this? Why am I sucking the energy out of other people? Don’t I have enough energy myself to support me in my life? Do I need energy from others to survive? Do I need support from others to survive, let say through a (well-paid) job? Do I need a job, any job, any support, from anyone, to survive in this world? Don’t I have enough energy by myself to stand here as a living being in this world, independent, fully capable of supporting myself and doing the things I came here to do (which is what, by the way)?
So the first feeling that came up when I was asking those question to myself was NO. I cannot do this. I have no energy left to do anything. It is not possible. I cannot do it without anyone else. I need support. I need someone, anyone, to support me in my life. Either through a job, through a relatinship or partnership, through money or an idea, whatever.
But it is not true. I need nobody. If I cannot do it by myself, if I cannot do anything by myself, I am not worth being called an independent, sovereign, human being. Any animal can support itself in life just fine. Why can’t I? This cannot be true. I do not allow it to be true. I do not allow this idea to take hold of my life, enslave me to the support of others, and not even to the ideas in my mind which tell me I depend on such support.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel week, in need of support, and incabable of surviving in this world by myself.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to indulge in feelings of weakness, hopelessness, confusion, and directionlessness that allowed me to not take a stand and decide where I wanted to go with my life.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to direct my energy to the mind, and thus channel it out of this world instead of into it.
- I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that it was my own choice to give my energy to the mind and thus producing a vaccum that sucked the energey of others around me into this vortex as well.
- I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to understand that I am equipped with enough of my own life energy and life force, which I can bring into this world, and that I do not need anybody to support me in life.
- I commit myself to stop channeling my energy out of this world and into the mind.
- I commit myself to stop abusing others and thus allowing their energy to be drained away through me as well.
- I commit myself to setting goals for myself as to how I want to direct my energy into this world.